Just A Thought...

I had a thought this week... For as far back as I can remember, I've always been extremely negative towards myself when it comes to my body and how I look... Whether it's being a certain size... or being a specific weight.  I can't even count how many times I've thought, 'UGH! I hate my thighs.' Or... 'Why do I have to have such a ghetto booty?'  Or... 'How did I miss out on getting some ta-ta's?'  My list of  'I hate this or that' about my body could seriously go on and on, but I'm stopping here.

My thought was this:  I bet it hurts God's feelings so bad when He hears me say these things about one of His many creations.  I really can't imagine creating 'something or someone' and then hear that person or thing talk crap about my creation as if I really wasn't listening.  I can see myself being so hurt and offended hearing that person say things like that.  I know how upset and hurt I feel when I cook or bake something and someone doesn't like it.  I usually cry.  Literally cry.  I have no idea why I'm just now coming to this conclusion, but I'm thankful I have.  I know everyone has done this and it probably isn't a big deal to most people, but I really felt bad when I thought about all the things I used to want to change about my body.  I could see God sitting on His throne, looking down at me and thinking, 'Really, Whit?  Why do you not want to be unique in your own skin?  Why do you want to look like everyone else?  Why do you not like My creation?  Why are you so worried about what other people think of you?  I am the only one who matters!!!'

I'm a strong believer when it comes to exercising and eating healthy.  Our body is the temple and I know God wants us to take care of it to the best of our ability.  We only get this one life to live, so let's protect it and keep it healthy, right?!  My weight and appearance have always been something I've struggled with.  I've always felt like I was never pretty enough.  Or I didn't have the right attributes that guys like in a girl.  Insecurity has been an issue in my life for as far back as I can remember. 

Just this week I gave room for the enemy to come in and attack my mind.  I was at a church service this week, a guy (that I thought was totally HOT) was there that I met several weeks ago.  He came up and spoke to me, and said, 'Hey!  It's ummm, Whitney? Right?'  I nodded, gave a slight smile, if you really wanna call it that, because at that very second I thought, 'Oh my gosh, he didn't even remember me?'  Whitney, right?  Really?  My mind is in full speed at this point and my thoughts are literally everywhere.  Yep, I went there.  I let my mind go to that place.  The place where my thoughts are out of control.  The place where the enemy is whispering thoughts like... 'What is it going to take for a great Christian guy to notice me, muchless remember me?  Am I that unfortunate looking?  Or I just don't have one of those memorable, pretty faces?'  I let these thoughts go on in my head for several minutes until finally I wake up, back into reality and remembered one of my most favorite things ever.  Regardless of what anyone else says or thinks about me, God says that I AM FEARFULLY & WONDERFULLY MADE.  I AM HIS MASTERPIECE.  I WAS MADE IN THE IMAGE OF GOD.  

It would've made my day if Mr. Hotness had actually remembered me.  It really would've made my day if he had even acted interested, but more than anything I'm so happy to know that my Heavenly Father, my Creator, and my Savior has never left me or forsaken me.  In my loneliest times I am reminded that He remembers me daily.  Because daily He reminds me of his love and grace every time I read His word or feel His presence. 

Psalm 139 is probably one of my favorite chapters in the whole Bible.  Verses 15-18 says, My frame was not hidden from you, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.  Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.  And in your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them.  How precious are your thoughts to me, O God!  How great is the sum of them!  If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand. 

How amazing is that!  I don't know about you, but ain't no man out there ever said anything like that to me!  Thank you Lord for creating me in your image.  Thank you for loving me even when I think thoughts or talk smack about your creation.  I love you with all my heart... You're always waiting with arms open wide from me!